


LR

by jonghyunshedgehog (IsurvivedReichenbach221B)



Category: K-pop, VIXX
Genre: First person writing, Love Letters, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Pining, Sweet, chapters can be read out of order, k-pop smut fanfics, kinda like love letters, lonely, mostly first person writing, needy, non related chapters, sad mood content, squabbles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-06 23:28:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 3,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16842592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IsurvivedReichenbach221B/pseuds/jonghyunshedgehog
Summary: Collection of my first smut K-Pop fics. Written in first person. All LR.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This work is not beta'd. This was previously published on tumblr.

It was so easy to push everyone away. Leo never had a problem with showing people exactly how he disliked them being close or too personal. Even with joining VIXX, he had been unable to stop himself from automatically pushing those away from him who he was supposed to keep close.

Yet, this particular man didn’t seem remotely flustered. Leo could push all the others away and they sat and questioned how he really felt. Yet Ravi… Kept coming back. He wiggled in front of Leo’s face, teasing him with smiles. He took getting shoved and came back moments later, always pushing barriers. Leo had no idea how to deal with this so he simply left it.

With hair that curled by his shoulders, he stared at Ravi while they readied for a photo shoot.

Stilling so hard that his muscles screamed at him, Leo snapped his attention up to Ravi. The man had shifted far closer than he should have been allowed. While he was being watched, Ravi stood up on his knees. Staring at that chest in front of him, Leo was struck still.

shoulders hand, he placed it hard on Rabi’s chest to push but Ravi gently shook his head. For some reason, Leo had no strength to push him back. Ravi raised both of his hands and Leo dropped his.

Ravi worked to tie part of Leo’s hair back. The touches were doing things deep down inside of Leo that he had never felt before.

He allowed this act to be finished, eyes tracking as Ravi lowered back down slowly.

That cocky grin was plastered, his head tilted back. Leo couldn’t do anything but watch, his heart pounding like mad in his chest.

“I was wrong.” Ravi murmured and Leo blinked, face hardening for what could possibly come out of this males mouth. “You look good both ways, not just one.”

Stunned, Leo was speechless, not by choice, and unable to react. Seemingly aware of what had just happened, Ravi grinned and focused forward to the cameras.

Leo watched the side of Ravi’s head a moment before doing the same. Shifting, he reached out with a hand and, out of the cameras view, slid two fingers over Ravi’s own.


	2. LR Promises

I couldn’t get over the way you tasted. Every single inch of your skin was ambrosia. I had never known the feeling of drowning, until I had met you.

The seconds away from you are torturous, I cannot begin to explain. I need you the moment I see you, to taste you. My tongue, to know every curve of your body. My mouth to trace every line. My fingers itch for you, soon screaming.

When I get you alone, I cannot wait until your mouth is so close, it becomes mine. My teeth pulling at your sensitive flesh, working sweet, incoherent babbling from your lips.

You will let me play you like an instrument, body bending to my will as I plucked tour chords until you begged for me. Giving you what you want, the feeling of sinking my body into yours, was pure bliss. Every time is always like the first, my mouth incapable of being quite while your body pulls gasping groans from me. The hands of yours that wander my chest, yanking on my shirt, rip out moans and I can’t help but slam so hard I might break you.

You never complain, rather you ask me to not stop. Never stop. No, never. It will last forever, and I’ll never he without you ever again.

Scream my name, whisper it into my ear, tremble under my hands and mouth. Promise to always be mine. For I am always yours.


	3. LR Love

I can do enough for us both, don’t worry. I know it’s hard for you to show anything, but we don’t ask much. We never will. You may not know it but we love you for exactly who you are.

And I may… Love you for far more. I’ll pick up where you leave off and never ask anything back. I want to. You don’t even have to ask me to. You never have to ask me to.

Screw what people say, your face in every single expression is more than enough for me. I wouldn’t have you any other way. Maybe that’s why I love you so damn much. I don’t expect you to feel anything back, but maybe you will? Doesn’t matter, because your happiness is all that matters and I’ll be apart of it even if it’s with someone else.

Because that’s what love means.


	4. LR Aegyo

Doing aegyo has gotten so much easier. Before, I barely could do anything remotely cute. It drove people away, more than I could ever count in ten years.

The world could have turned away from me and I’d have slid into the crowds, no one giving me a second glance. Except you were never going to let me do that.

It took a while, years, but we worked on it. The others helped but I couldnr possibly imagine where I would be if I didn’t have your smile. The encouragement you gave when I did it correctly and I felt your hands on me, encouraging and soothing.

How could I ever go back, knowing I’d be without you? I owe you so much, Ravi. Don’t ever think that my being able to stand alone without you means I don’t need you anymore because I always will.

Stay with me because the aegyo I give our fans is nothing compared to what I can give you.


	5. LR Date

"I hope you remembered to try the soup before retiring for the night. -WS”

My phone lit up and I rolled over, snagging it from the bedside table. You were always concerned, and I never minded in the slightest. In fact,it warmed me deep down to my core. Staring at the words, I felt myself smile inwardly though my face didn’t change. It was sweet.

Responding that I had, in fact, eaten and that I wished you a good night, I put my phone back down. The hotel I currently resided in had a gentle hum to it that threatened to soothe me to sleep. Regardless of the lethargy, I waited until you sent back: “Sleep well. -WS”

I was only due to be gone for a short few weeks, a family matter, but it felt like longer. You had been busy when I had needed to leave and I hadn’t had time to tell you. My plans of calling you as the plane landed had been smashed to bits when I was caught up in the problems with which I had come to help handle.

Eventually having spoken to you-though feeling utterly horrible for not having done so sooner-you had seemed collected and unbothered over the phone and all I wanted was to go home. To you. Though I could never express such things even when alone, it didn’t mean I didn’t feel them. I simply hoped upon hope that somehow you knew.

The plane ride back was uneventful, a message on my phone stating my Uber was waiting for me as I landed. Everything was in it’s rightful place and I busied myself with snagging my bag. Sliding the mask over my face, I left the plane and headed out.

My entire being snapped to attention when I saw you. My Ravi stood, looking like a buffet in comparison to a snack, simply staring at me. I could feel myself unmoving for far too long so I forced my legs into motion. After not seeing you for so long, and refusing to think of you while away, this was a shock. I tried to think of something to say, perhaps a way to let you know that I was grateful you had shown up to see me home, but nothing of the sort came from my mouth.

I offered a hug but my bag had me concerned for it, so the hug wasn’t exactly what I wanted. Not to mention, we were in a populated area and the hug I wanted to give I couldn’t even do so behind closed doors.

“Why did you come pick me up?” I whispered in your ear, uninterested in anyone passing by hearing.

“Because I can. I had a free day and figured you’d like lunch.” You were such a bad liar, really. You grinned in that way of yours that made my knees week, mouth dry. It was wholly unfair the way you had that power of me and flat out abused it. The idea of spending time with you, our bodies busy with food, had me yield.

Truthfully, I loved the time we spent together but part of it was the teasing. I didn’t want us to take things too far, not willing to ruin the friendship, but I loved the teasing. The playfulness. It warmed me on the insides and, considering you continue to play, I assume it’s the same for you. 

“Is that your asking for a date?” The soft words were packed with mild annoyance, but only just. The never-fading smirk on your face assured me you didn’t take it personal and I could have smiled.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” You teased and I couldn’t help but immediately sigh and lean away, fighting an eye roll. Your response had been perfect and my chest felt tight, knowing everything was well between us.

For a brief moment I toyed with the idea of simply giving in. Of turning the friendship into something more, but we had far too much fun beating around the proverbial bushes. Maybe one day… 

“Let’s go, then!” Snapping me out of my momentary wistful thinking, you grabbed hold of my hand and jerked me back into reality. I finally smiled behind the mask, staring at the back of your head and finding the ear buds you wore rather attractive. Squeezing your hand, I felt at ease.


	6. LR Saranghae

I had a dream the other night and you were in it. You looked sad for some reason and I could not, for the life of me, figure out why.

No matter what I did, I could not make a sound. My mouth would open, I would scream, but silence engulfed us both. Unaware, you simply stared. Watching as I fought against an invisible enemy.

The dream shifted, tossing us around and pulling us apart. I panicked, needing you. I screamed your name, cries out for you. I clawed at the ground and walls until blood fell from my fingertips.

The ground turned to wood and my nails ground it to sand. Ocean sounds filled the void where my screams had been and I shoved up. You stood, staring at me from a distance away. 

Without thinking, I ran. I scrambled forward and made a mad dash across the sand. I couldn’t lose you, even in a dream. Even if I couldn’t speak.

Like the ocean crashing to the shore, I slammed into you. Your aema wound around d me and everything felt right. I was home, right where I belonged.

Out of my mouth, I could speak once more. As you craddled me to you, all I could manage after trying so hard to say anything at all:

“Saranghae.”


	7. LR Muse

“Why do you love me, baby?” Oh, how I shall count the ways.

It was a slow burn, at first, knowing how I felt about you. But, quietly, I allowed it to happen. What was so terrible, about being in love with a man? Especially one so perfect? 

Out of everyone in the world, I never thought it would be you. My passion, my Muse. I write songs about you and hope you know that, though not all of them, but most are for you. I know you feel something for me, I do. In shared looks and small touches. Being who you are, though, you’d never say.

Quiet, silent, I can wait eternity for you. That’s what love is for. I watched you listen to Nirvana and those lyrics came on, my voice speaking to you even as the whole world heard.

I saw that look in your eyes and the glance at me and it felt like a win. The small shift you gave and the gentle touch along my shoulder from yours as you passed me by afterwards. There is something there.

I ask why you love me but I don’t really know if it’s love. In reality, I’m the one that loves you. I just hope you feel the same.


	8. LR Connection

I promise, one day I’ll be able to tell you what happened. That we met and my worries slipped away. That, out of everyone, I have never wanted someone more.

When my eyes landed on you, there was no reason for me to think we could get along the way we do now. I didn’t like you; I didn’t like anyone. I was sure every person I was to meet would eventually shove me away but you didn’t. You smiled and I couldn’t help but love it.

As the months ticked by and you stayed, I loved it even more. I couldn’t believe a year passed, and then two. More. You held me up even without touching me. Kept me going even when I didn’t want to.

With a single look, you had me forcing myself back up on my feet and staggering forward. So, I owe it to you, one day, to tell you how much you saved me. From myself and from the world. 

You showed me how to love and how to exist. Without you, I wouldn’t be me. I would be something else, so completely wrong none would recognise me. All because of you. 

Soon, Wonsik, I’ll be able to get it out.


	9. LR Touches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picture/photoshoot promt when they played with each other's faces.

I knew we had to touch. We had been touching for years. This seemed somehow different.

A few nights prior, we had been eating lunch when he had accidentally moved too close. On reflex, for some reason, I had out my hand down and held his thigh. It seemed to rake forever before I managed to turn my head and look at him. The kiss we shared then was slow, loving, but all. I had pulled away first, meaning to shift, but he had left.

He had gotten up and walked away, leaving me wondering if my initiation of a kiss had been wrong. This photo shoot today would answer a few questions, but I was unsure if I could take the answers.

Walking up to him, sewing the red of his clothing, I smiled. Playing it off as casual, I draped my arm over his shoulders and he relaxed into it. That meant he was okay.

As the shoot continued, I refused to allow myself to dwell on the desire to ask about that night. Especially refusing myself the idea of replaying that, even here.

He caressed playfully over my face, which pushed my limits and forced me to move or I’d be in trouble. Thinking myself funny, I shifted our positions and did the same to him. What I didn’t count on was his mouth, teeth and all coming after my hand.

Heart slamming in my chest, all I could think about was how soft his lips were. How kissing him had felt like the best mochii treat in the world. How I wanted it again. Pulling my hand back slowly, he followed and the most vibrant image of him following me on a bed…

Halting my mind there, I inhaled as quietly as possible and shunned the thoughts from my mind.

Though we played some more, I was successfully able to keep my mind from falling straight into the gutter. Up until he bit me. To be fair, I had been asking for it. I rather obviously stuck my finger in front of his mouth and, as I had wanted, he bit. My whole body was on alert as I pulled my hand back, feeling that mouth. It was so warm, crap.

When he released my finger, I couldn’t help but hold his shoulder hard, staring at his face. He looked back at me, eyes low and dark, face without expression. He licked his lips and leaned closer to my face. He moaned, low, and flicked his head upward before looking away. Stunned, I stared at the back of his head. 

I didn’t know much about the way Leo flirted, but something told me that our kiss that day wasn’t the last.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picture/photoshoot prompts from the black and white LR.

“Lean upon me, I will hold you up. When the void inside becomes too much, I will be your ledge. If your nails rip into my flesh while I try so desperately to stay, I will never complain. 

"When I asked you to be mine, I meant it all. I asked for you, not part of you, and this void that sits inside of you becomes my burden as well.

"When you cried because you thought you were too much, I assured you it was okay and swore to prove you wrong.

"There is too much in this world we can have and do. I want you to be by my side for it all.

"If my existence isn’t enough, I’ll scoure the earth to find what is. Because nothing here, in this life, is worth anything without you.”

~

The words he spoke hurt, only because they were true. I had been hiding from myself, from him, for so long. He demanded I speak them, the words. Simple words, really, but I couldn’t.

I couldn’t say them aloud. So I hushed him, silenced him, and he saw me do it. He grew quiet and accepted my act upon his person. I watched his eyes flutter closed, felt the softness of his lips under my hand.

I wanted to scream the words to every person upon the planet but, my king, they would not come out. When my lips part, all I get is an inhale.

I see him accept this as an answer to his demands and know that it was all he was going to get. I couldn’t do this. Not to him. I may not be able to speak what he wanted to hear, but I could act.

All I had to do was show him how much he meant to me and maybe then, just maybe, I’d be able to say that I needed him.


	11. LR Passion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> IMPLIED SEX

I fell in love with how he tasted, first. The way his mouth had melted under mine. The way his skin had tasted better than honey along his throat. I loved the way his pulse in his throat sped up by the time my lips found it.

I fell in love with the gasp that came out of his lips, his head tilting back when I suckled his throat. The way he groaned and pressed for our bodies to be closer together.

His collarbone tasted the same, maybe better. There were hints of sweat but I didn’t care in the least.

I fell so deeply in love with the way his skin felt under my hands. It gave way in undulating movements that amazed me. We’d laugh if I hit a tickle spot, giggling as our mouths connected again so the noises would drown to moans.

I quickly fell in love with the way he whimpered, crawling into my lap and letting my body sink into his. The way he moved, almost desperately, to be ever matched with me. He was wild, in only the way he could be. Desperate to be so close, fearing it would be gone the next moment.

I fell in love with the way his legs wrapped over my hips, flexing as he moved. He clung to me, nails leaving tiny crescents in my flesh, while the sounds of our pleasure filled the space all around us. I held him just as strong, his body bending to mine and our mouths finding purchase.

I loved the way he fell apart so gorgeously, without restrictions, in my grasp. The mess of us in the end didn’t bother me, or him. I stayed inside of his body, smoothing hair from his brow and kissing him all over. He needed to know I wasn’t leaving, and I needed to reassure myself that he needed me.

I fell the most in love with the way he said, “saranghae.”


	12. LR Stregth

“I wanted to hold your hand, but there were too many people in the room. It was crowded and my heart raced so much, bruising ribs.

"When I leaned up against you, you understood. You always do, and I don’t know how. But it was enough. I didn’t have to grab out and cling to you for you to understand.

"You stood there, allowing me to draw strength from you without question. How do I express to you the depths of my soul, that reach out for you? The yearning inside of my blood that soothes simply when you’re near?

"What words do I use to describe how thick the air becomes the moment you are gone; the impossibility of how harder the world becomes? Or when, at times like these, your solid form holds me up and the world slows down.

"Maybe… There are no words necessary. Perhaps you, somehow, with all the beautiful wonder that you are, already know.”


	13. LR Choices

He would look, at times, when Leo didn’t pay attention. He stared at the mans face like he couldn’t believe Leo existed. How could he, really? The man was gorgeous and, amazingly enough, loved him back. 

In the only way Leo knew how to, that is. Gently, quietly, shyly. With his whole soul, but in silent moments it was there. Ravi knew. 

One day, Leo may be able to tell Ravi what their hand-holding meant. What the small cuddling meant and why it felt so different than the others. What it meant when Ravi would glance up and Leo would be watching him. 

Or when Leo chose him, above all else, to protect him from the parts of the world he couldn’t handle.

For now, he’ll be satisfied knowing that, out of everyone on this planet, Leo chose him.


End file.
